Inktober Day 14: Love is a Battlefield

Ink on paper – Lyrics Sung by: Pat Benatar

She trained as an opera singer. She worked years to develop her voice into a fine tuned tool. Where did she make her most impact as a performer, rock and roll! Pat Benatar exploded onto the music scene in the 1980s as a powerhouse performer. This song was one of her breakout hits, hard, loud and full of passion. It is an iconic theme of the 1980s and a billboard classic, known by rockers all over the globe.

We do not often want to think about love being a battlefield, yet it is a battle we choose to fight everyday. When we love people it can be hard, loud, tough to do. Their habits that annoy, our habits that contradict what they want, the inability to understand each other on the simplest things. Love is not always a mushy, gushy, warm and fuzzy experience. It takes guts, courage and an ability to constantly forgive. Love demands that we change , learn and adapt in order for the relationships to survive. Living in the world is tough enough, doing that AND loving people adds an element of tenacity which requires the ability to fight.

When we give up the will to fight, the relationship is in trouble. When we no longer care enough to put in the effort, listen and absorb, or even have any sense of caring for making things work, it’s demoralizing. Battle done, this time that battle ends in a loss. Problem is we may still be in that relationship so we fake it, phone it in, having given up the fight we coast. Nothing but occupying space and eventually everyone knows it.

This is when we have to harbor back to why we loved in the first place. Just because the fight feels done, are we willing to give up? Or is it time to regroup, recuperate and think about things a little differently? Today’s battle may have been a loss, does that mean we have lost the war? Or does it mean we have to reframe this defeat into a learning moment and try another way? Major battles are not won and done, they usually take a long time to plan, execute and win. Love is the same way. It takes time, effort, distance and an ability paired with willingness to keep going. This is when the real battle begins. Instead of giving up, choose to love and keep going. Choose to battle on, make it work, figure out the plan then work the plan. Complacency is not a defeat, it is a choice. No one ever said love was a short, easy game…love is a battlefield! So get in there and fight!

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