It is so much easier to forgive someone than it is to forget what they did that needed to be forgiven. Sure it can be daunting to take a deep breathe and forgive, especially if the offense causeD scars that are slow to heal. We’ve all been there on both sides of the equation. The more we forgive the more we are forgiven. Living with human beings can be a deep challenge to our rough edges, and yet none of us is without the need for someone else to forgive us. It is when we forget that things begin to change.
Forgetting means turning off those old tapes in our head that remind us to not trust, not believe, not risk because we were hurt once and chances are we will be hurt again. Those nasty tapes program us towards fear and anger. They chain us to emotions and experiences in our past which have the power to prevent us from embracing our future. If we keep listening to those same nasty voices in our heads about why “they” let us down, did us wrong, made a mistake, or even do not deserve our attention after what they did, then we are doomed! No one will ever meet our standards or be perfect and without fault to we worthy of our love and affection. By remembering every time we were wronged we are paving the way to live our life alone, in anger and self pity. And what kind of life would that be?
Or we can choose to forget, forgive and wipe the slate clean. “But you don’t know what they did!” You’re right, I don’t. If you keep bringing it up you will never forget. How perfect are you? So you’ve NEVER done anything that needed the salve of forgiveness? That needed to be forgotten? That prevented people from believing in your sincerity or trustworthiness? Maybe we need to forgive so that we can give the same gift someone we wronged gave us when they forget our transgressions. We get what we give, and if we are unable to forget then we are creating a world with only one side, our side and who would want that type of person in their life?
So it is time to forget by erasing those old tapes. Let go of the offense, the past and all the emotions tied to it. The only way we move forward is by unchains ourselves from the past. To do that we have to stop retelling the story, recalling the emotions and reminding ourselves of what was done to us. Instead let’s look to an exciting future filled with healthy thoughts and emotions, ones that help propel us towards our dreams.