Welcome back to my monthly feature, a guest writer. Today’s post was written by Sandra Wells. Enjoy!
Like most quotes, this is a ginormous oversimplification. Saying that staying stuck is more painful than change is a big statementbecause deep-down character change can be torture. In my opinion, if you want the best illustration of the how hard life change can be, watch the Biggest Loser or Hoarders.
The episode always starts with the contestant REALLY wanting and needing help. And to the viewing audience, the path seems obvious. Of course, that man doesn’t want to weigh 500 lbs. and of course that lady doesn’t want to live in a house overflowing with 50-year-old trash.
Like clockwork, right in the middle of the season there is a lot of bleeping because these same, humble and broken contestants are screaming foul things to people that they love and respect. This happens because, at that exact moment, the brain is getting rewired. Their soul is in a life-or-death fight against this change because the old behavior worked for them for decades. Their brain does not realize that what used to work is now killing them.
The only way to push past this moment is to have outside people who are willing to get spit on and called names to push them through that moment in a firm, non-judgmental way. Without this outside support, their brains choose to do what they have done before – every time.
So maybe in this moment, its looks less painful to put off making that change one more hour, one more day or one more week. But really it isn’t. When they do that they are just choosing a different pain. The long-dull pain of loneliness, denial and watching the world go by.
Even knowing all of those things, it’s still never an easy choice
Sandra can be found on Instagram @wellsvsandra or at firstname.lastname@example.org