God knew…

Last year really kicked my butt – excuse my bluntness, but it did. I had a terrible work environment where nothing I did was right. I’m not just pouting here, it was awful! No matter what I produced, it was wrong. No one in our office could do anything to our boss’ approval (I won’t get started on the control and abuse issues involved there!) I can’t tell you how much that impacted my year. To get up each day and know to the marrow of your being that nothing you did that day would be right, appreciated, or recognized REALLY wears on your soul. I mean I got to the point where I would lay in bad and wonder why I was getting up. Yes I had the gallery and a growing business, but even in that world I got my butt kicked. EVERY show I applied for said ‘no thanks’. It seemed that no one liked my work anymore and no one wanted me anywhere. Every door I opened got slammed shut tight, and sometimes I wasn’t able to pull my fingers out quickly enough to avoid getting crushed. Ugh! The continual negative greatly impacted me. And yet somewhere in all that, I knew that God had a plan and a bigger vision of my future than I could imagine while I was enduring each day. I ken that God knew…

I started a new job a month ago, and what a difference. I now work in an environment where my work, expertise and ideas are not only appreciated but welcomed with open arms! Yes there will be a heavy workload, I know that is coming, but I feel emotionally prepared to manage it. I am better able to face the challenges of this new year as my work life has changed. It wasn’t an overnight thing, I started looking in March and did not find the right job until December. Yet God knew…

With the first month of the year over, I can see a horizon where exciting and big adventures loom in my future. If I had been accepted into all the shows or festivals where I applied, I would not have been able to handle a new job. Odd to say that rejection in this case was a blessing. Yipes! How many times in your life have you said THAT? The bigger picture meant accepting terrible disappointment to be better prepared for a bright future – it means passing through the dry, dusty desert to get to the peace and tranquility of the cool mountains. When you’re in the desert, you can’t picture any way out. There seems to be no hope, no vision, and no way out – and you are surrounded by ugly, bitter pain and disappointment. God knows…

We’re one month into 2013, and embracing the rejection and pain has prepared me for a brighter future. Kelly Clarkson sings it loud and proud – “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger!” FER Sure!!! As an encouragement to those of you who are living through the desert days – it will get better. I don’t know when, or how, or why – but it will get better. One of my signature pieces, and real crowd favorite (and a great seller) is a quote from Victor Hugo…

Have courage for the great sorrows of life and patience for the small ones – and when you have laboriously accomplished your daily tasks, go to sleep God is awake!

God is awake and knows what you need now for your future…God knows!